AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Ladies and Gentlemen, in the light of events that are scheduled to occur next month onwards, we interrupt your regularly scheduled blog to bring you this important public service message.

*Ahem*
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWTFWTFWTFWTF!!!!AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!SHITHELLCRAPDICKOMG!!!!MOMMYDADDYUNCLEAUNTYDADADADIFREAKINSAVEME!!

I am SCREWED! Screwed, you get it?, like 'Phillips or Flathead' kinda screwed...
Because I can count the weeks left to the boards on one hand and half a foot, and it feels like I know nothing. My sieve-like mind has let my 2 years worth of slogging fall out, fly forth and turn into dust, scattered by the four winds...

So I guess you might understand if situations prevail that may never let me blog again...

oh, and also, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year, dear readers...

.
.
.
.
.
.
P.S.-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

In Flames...

There was a huge demonstration at Gateway last night, and a somewhat smaller one at Chembur on Sunday. My dad went for the first one, and everyone in Chembur and Ghatkopar, except me, it seems, came for the second.

It's not that I'm skeptical about demonstrations like these. I did the whole 'candle in the windowsill' thing myself, the second I got the sms. Forwarded it to other people too.

But in the end, there are two ways of looking at it.

One- It's a symbol of hope and solidarity for all those involved.

Two- It's a way for people to feel happy because they think they have done something to solve the issue. Mental Masturbation.

All I'm going to say is, nine bucks a candle, one at Gateway multiplied by..approximately a lakh people who came to the rally...

About 9 Lakh, could be invested to get some decent equipment for the police.
I'm just saying there are more constructive things to be done than burning candles.

Saw some pretty good slogans at the rallies...I thought the best one was-

"Someday, maybe, we might forgive.
But we will never forget."

Sommebody gonna get-a-Fucked, Reeeal Bad...

I'm not going to state the obvious here. You know what I'm talking about. A bunch of brainwashed psychos in their quest for heavenly poontang went off and tried to take over the Taj and the Oberoi hotels. Everybody knows that. What else you obviously know, is that this post is a reasonably mindless rant made by a mentally unbalanced teenager, and you probably aren't expecting something too intelligent.

I'm not going to (for once) criticize the Law enforcement agencies for their action/inaction or whatever. It's just not my place.
If I was given the task to lay siege to the hotels, my strategy would involve crowds of people chanting 'Cocksucker, Motherfucker' through loudspeakers, repeatedly and with increasing intensity, to mess up the Terrorists enough for them to do something stupid...and then the Commandos could move in.

This obviously proves that I'm no strategist, who can comment on the techniques of the police. I have a new-found respect for the Navy Commandos too.

I'm pissed off at the news channels too. Between Barkha Dutt and Rajdeep Sardesai, the victims, authorities and bystanders have been harrased with every tactless and/or mildly retarded question possible. Which, on the internet, may be called 'some fuckin annoying flamebait'. But hell, it's not exactly unexpected, is it? They just want some eyeballs on 'em...

I'm friggin fuck nuts annoyed at the stance of Politicians, either using this situation as a weapon (Modi, I'm lookin at you), or 'Strongly Condemning' the attacks, because they can't do any other goddamn thing about it. I don't think there are ay phrases more annoying to me than 'Strongly Condemn'. Fix the problem, and then excercise your mouth.

What I will state, and have been stating, though, is exclusively, my own opinion.

Somebody gonna get-a-Fucked...Reeeaal Bad.

Even the most placid, flatfooted, grass chomping stromboni, when pushed far enough, has it's survival insticts kick in. And we've been pushed pretty goddamn far. And if another of these situations go by with a pat on the head from a politician, and a one fingered salute to the 'Mumbai Spirit', people are just gonna go set fire to stuff, go crazy, crate Anarchy.

What the fuck is with that whole 'Mumbai Spirit' thing anyway? They say we bounce back after ecery calamity. Does that mean we should get thrown around even harder? Who asked you to measure our modulus of motherfucking elasticity?????

You know how I said there wasn't a more annoying phrase than 'Stongly Condemn'? Well I just found it.

If those terrorists get caught, by ordinary individuals instead of the police, They're gonna feel that Mumbai Spirit. A city of stressed out workers in a rat race with no means of a release, who get battered on a monthly basis by some tragedy or the other but pick themselves up and go to work, not because thy're brave or bold, but because they have to earn some money to live another day in this hole, and while they're at it, earn some more money to pay taxes which go towards ensuring that the roads, and sidewalks, and parks and buses and trains are NOT fixed or improved, while we suffocate in the poisonous air. They're gonna get some Mumbai Spirit, all right...right in the ass...

And to the Negligent Government of the State and Centre - We've grown up on pothole-filled roads to drive on, poison to breathe, Traffic, Floods, Bombs, Bullets, Gang Wars, Bent Cops, everything down to fucking Lightning strikes. That doesn't mean we want things to stay this way, you bitches...

The End of an Era/Error

I booted up my PC and fired up Opera to check up on the Animax-sa Forums. It's something that I do from time to time, not with the alarming frequency that I used to visit, back when my boards had just ended. I check a few sections that I visit often, and I see an announcement from the friendly neighbourhood mod.

The Forum is being shut down and a new one is being set up in its place. Which means, all threads will be lost, all post counts will be reset. Which kinda shook me up.

Most people who visit this blog reasonably often, are people who will probably understand why it bothers me. It shouldn't, if viewed objectively...Internet Forums are usually cited as the one piece of irrefuteable proof that the Internet is making people stupid. The average Messageboard is a writhing mass of Trolls, Spambots, lolcats and a quest for the 'lulz'.

(if any of you didn't get that, congratulations on your normalcy, now go look it up on Urban Dictionary...)

Add to that the fact that I have my exams coming up, well...most would say there are more important things to worry about.

But strangely enough, when I joined back in 2006, the Forum was lightyears above average, in terms of intellectualism. It was a platform for anime fans such as myself to share opinions and views, and considering there was NOBODY else I knew (living nearby) who watched anime or read manga, it was a blessing.

Sure it's infuriatingly slow, and it's tailor made to sun on IE 5. Which kinda gives you an idea of how outdated the firmware was. But we didn't mind. It's not everyday when you find a place with 1000+ like minded members... (unless you're really into visiting porn sites...in which case, it IS everyday...)


Dylan, Shady, Wolf, Ace, HK, Kysh, Leon, Sin, Blackcat, Ithil, Vazha, Kyo...even Aubin...and DS...and so many other people...if it wasn't for the forum I wouldn't know them, probably...In fact, I probably wouldn't be able to write this blog...I wouldn't be active online that much either...

So it is with great nostalgia that I bid adieu to the old and ring in the new. At least I hope it's worth it.

Psst, Flug people, How about a reboot to the Out Of The Blue series? Hey, it worked for Batman...

Sliver of Doubt.

Doubt, it's quite a thing. Sneaks up on you when you least expect it and hits you with all the subtlety of a frag grenade. Not being content with that, it flings those bits of flak at you, which find their way into your brain, and leave you paralysed...

I have temporarily pulled myself up out of the cesspool of depression that my daily routine has become, to take five minutes doing what I do best. Whining and Bitching like no one else can.

It wouldn't be so bad if I was sure I'll never get into IIT. That's fine, I can live with that. It would be friggin sweet if I knew for sure that I'd get a rank, but that's really not the case either. It's this whole 'in between' thing that makes it hard. If I don't try, it's sad cause I'm passing up the chance that I might get in. But if you try and end up getting screwed, well...it's two years wasted and a lifetime's worth of depression for nothing...

I'm not even sure getting in is worth it, now. Sometimes I feel like I just might make it to a seat in IIT-B, other times I feel like my optimism is delusional. Somewhere in the middle, I end up hoping I get into the new IIT-G, which is being mentored by Mumbai, so I'll end up studying in the IIT B campus even if I'm ranked low...

But for it to be worth all this, all the work, all the crippling depression that students endure, IIT has  to be pretty fucking mindblowing. The professors better be some sort of psychics, chanelling the spirits of Einstein or freaking Newton, for this to be worth it. The campus ought to be a damn beach resort, for this to be worth it. Upon graduation, we ought to be declared supreme rulers of the free freakin world. Throw in 42 virgins in heaven and some M&M's, and all of that might just make it all worth it...

I end with a (doctored) line from South Park, which I think summarizes the whole dilemma nicely.

'Trying for IIT is like a man dying of thirst, getting cow urine poured down his throat. He thinks, "Well, I AM thirsty, but this is fucking Cow Piss..."

Reunion

P.P. is holding a reunion next week, for the class of 2007. Those of you who were paying attention may remember that the official reunion was around 6 months ago. But that one was panned by critics for it's low entertainment value and large unruly crowds, so this one is for our batch only. Which is around 160 people, but it's not like everyone's coming, right?

I'm actually wondering if I should go (Yes, 'should' because I don't really have classes then, I lied so you'd quit pestering me, okay, XYZ?)because last time was a real disaster.

Imagine a guy at a party who doesn't know anyone there, and after a few failed attempts at making conversation, he ends up playing on his cell phone, in a corner, wondering whether staying home and watering the plants would make for a more entertaining evening. That guy was me.

Not that I didn't know anybody, technically. But I'm so out of touch, they may have well been strangers, and as anyone who's tried knows, Trying to talk to strangers is tough (let's not forget, your momma told you not to)

And at a moment like this that it hits me once more, how strange it is that It's so easy to give your opinion to the entire world online, but so hard to talk to just one guy you haven't seen for a few months...

Strange...

Raj T's followers break stuff=Front page news
Bomb Blast in Manipal=Page Eleven

I really don't see why there should be so much disparity...

Wannabe Insanity...

I'm tired of people online who claim to be insane, or crazy, or high,, just for the hell of it, after which they continue to act and talk in an absolutely normal way...
I mean, half the blogs I visit have the word 'insane' in it's name...insanitypills, moodsofinsanity, insaneasylum...you get the idea...

What I want to ask is- Do you have even the slightest idea how it feels to be insane? Off balance? Round the bend? Few nickels short of a dollar?

If you ever reach that situation, pretty soon You'll find yourself start talking about things like barometric irrigation in the steppes of Antarctica. You'll act like a junkie monkey hopped up on pink marijuana, purple pills and that white powder you found in your hair. Speed beans from the mezzanine of Hotel Chupanime, make you scream like potassium hydrazine. Two steps forward, one step back, breakdance baby!, and then eight steps to the left is where you dig for the treasure of le Concubine, pronounced with an 'Aye' at the end.

After you get to that stage, there's really no going straight, so jump headlong into the delicious stupidity like a marsmallow in the chocolate fountain of ethereal fantasies. Hang out with rainbow coloured dinousaurs (but not purple ones, mind you...) and maybe they'll tell you the sqaure root of negative two, if you play nice and act right and don't get motion sickness as you drive down memory lane, they won't drop you off for a probing at Area 51...

At this point, you're probably wondering what you're doing going 120 miles per hour in the wrong lane, in a blue-and-yellow corvette screaming down the road, smelling like german leather, as you stare at the pale green sky. It's really great weather to be running through the heather inhaling that sweet ether (...or was it ester?). Showering in enols,thiols and some alcohol, telling tinkerbell not to hide the aldehydes when you're trying to judge your time of flight when you throw yourself off from the height of 18 squared feet...

According to your calculations, you should land smack in between two logicians who are arguing about the percentage constitution of their handfuls of lemon cherry pudding. I suggest you join the fun and tell them that the answer is one, to the power fotry eight parts per hundered, divided by 2 minus five + 3...

You might think It's plain to see, that I'm crazy, irrevocably, but realize that I pity all you chumps who act so silly, and ignore all the nitty-gritties of the fact that you cling to rationality, but feign insanity, you wannabes, and all the while you get your jollies from pretending to be an inmate of a rubber room facility...

If you read all way here, I hereby to put rest to your fears, I scorn your feeble attempts at feigning insanity. Until you really feel the strain that breaks your mind and burns your brain, you haven't cracked under stress- to be driven, totally, and intensely...mad...

So quit pretending, and leave the crazy to me, a'ight?

Russel Peters!

OMG, Russel Peters is going to be performing at Shanmukhananda on 27th October...
God damn my classes that make it impossible for me to go...

For those of you who don't know him, Russel Peters is a Jamaican-Canadian-Indian stand up comedian...who's jokes are pure awesome...

Here are a few-



and you gotta watch

Hump day Happenings...

Wednesday...Hump Day...apparantly it's called that because it comes right in the middle of the work week, and once you get over it, things get better by friday and the weekend...

Happily enough though, this week seems better than usual, as World Movies is airing freaking awesome movies today-  Swindled, Rainbow Song, Offside and The Great Dictator...(last one airs on thursday at six am...), And I very conveniently am home alone with no lectures to go to! Sweet...

That aside, I'd recommend these movies to anyone who has even a casual interest in world cinema...

On another note, jus got an incredibly crappy chain letter, that starts like this-

Once you have opened this e-mail, there's no turning back. Below are true descriptions of zodiac signs. Read your sign, then forward it on, with your zodiac sign and label on the subject line. This is the real deal, try ignoring or changing it, and the first thing you'll notice is 
having a horrible day starting tomorrow morning - and it only gets worse from there

Oh yeah? Well fuck you...my day sucks already, and there isn't really much you can do to make it even worse...

Photography

Random pics from my cell phone...

Kitten-On its seat at a local eatery...

Sprite + Ice Cream = Antidepressant.

The kinda day that makes you want to whip up a glass  of anti depressant...

The K.J. Somaiya Orion Racing team on a practice run preparing for the students grand prix.

The damn thing is real fast, the last two were taken on burst fire mode...

The first was taken upside down, don't blame me, I was surprised that it actually runs...

Newborn stray puppies, at Neelkanth valley.

The Art of Conversation...

...is dead to me now.

I find it harder and harder to have a normal conversation nowadays. I had this one with friend after he succeded in irritating me with a 'Crazy Frog' impression...

Me: Dude,  stop that, or I swear, I am gonna kick you so hard, it'll take a team of surgeons to get my foot outta your ass...

Him: Why?

Me: What?

Him: Why would you wanna put your foot up an ass? Incredibly dirty place to put a foot, don'tcha think?

Me: Well, I can always wash my feet...The butt, on the other hand, is gonna end up pretty sore, something that can't be so easily fixed...

Him: You can always go to a doctor...

Me: Yes, but fixing it involves a lot of pain and embarrasment, which is the motive for the foot-stuffing in the first place...Just imagine how embarrasing it might be to go ask your doctor to stich your ass up...

Him: ...

Me: Pretty damn embarrasing...

Him: I'd imagine a lot of gay guys have that problem...

Me: -_- ...I'd imagine they use something...

Me: You know, that novadaine or duragel or something?

Him: Novocaine?

Me: No, that's what dentists use...

Him: It's the same thing, Mahendra Vatsa mentioned it...the gel stuff...

Me: The same stuff that dentists put on their hands... 0_0

Him: ...eew...imagine a gay dentist...using the same jar of gel for two VERY different purposes...

Me: Dude, please...why won't he buy another jar, if he was so inclined to use it for err...personal use?

Him: Yeah right, imagine him asking the chemist guy...'I'd like two jars please...one for the clinic..and one for...er...*cough*...Home....'

Me:...

Me: You are one sick SOB...you know that, right?

Assoholic...

My Math professor is an Assoholic- which is to say, he's addicted to being an asshole...

It doesn't give him enough pleasure to give us IIT level sums which he knows we haven't covered in the portion yet, but he shouts at us like a cranky drill seargent hopped up on a coffee and red bull cocktail...complete with his special brand of trash talk...

 

I'm not saying that he says things like 

'You call that differentiation? My Grandma differentiates better than you!'

or

'You boys couldn't integrate a straight line...'

or

'You need to solve a sum every 10 seconds in CET, soldier, and you know what, listening to me, you just wasted 10 seconds! Hop to work, ya lazy no-good, sleep loving, life-having scumbag!' 

But I'm saying he's almost there...

He also takes great pleasure in discussing his weekend plans, smack dab when wer'e in the middle of a real mind boggler, and as a result, I really don't know the answer, but I know that gaping asshole has watched 'You don't mess with the Zohan, Chaos Theory, Hamlet and Hari Puttar (WTF ?-_-) in the past week, not because they were any good, but just because he could...

Arrogant IITian...one of the few bad examples I've met. Here I take the opportunity to quote Samuel L Jackson from one of his most intellectually stimulating movies...-XXX...

'Why is it always the Assholes who pass the tests?'

Maybe I should Re-Think Things...

Just had an argument with a friend over whether god cares about humans or not, where at the end she got offended and decided never to talk to me again...

That's when I messaged another friend (Himura_Kenshin, for those of you who know him) and asked him the same thing

What followed was this pretty wierd conversation-

Me: Hey, religious question- Do you think God cares about humans?

HK- Actually, I'm an Atheist, did you forget?

Me: Ah...well...I guess I did, but assuming there is a God, what do you think?

HK- I don't think he/she/ really cares. If he/she did George Bush wouldn't be alive and Saddam wouldn't be dead...

Me: Yeah, that's what...what? Saddam...Hussein?

HK: Yeah, him...great statesman, did a lot for Women in the country and stood up to the American Invaders.

Me: Wasn't he like...a mass murdering dictator of some sort, you know, gassing villages with nerve gas, so the people wouldn't think of rebelling and stuff...

HK: VX Gas was never found! it was all false propoganda...

Me: Didn't National Geographic get those pics of scar faced villagers?

HK: Ever heard of Photoshop? -_-

Me: Um...not so probable back in 91...

...It's around this time when I start thinking, 'when the only guy on your side thinks Saddam Hussein is the bomb, maybe there need to be a few changes in your philosophy...'

Is There a Priest in the House?

On my way to class last week, I noticed two men distributing flyers on topics such as 'Is there a God', and 'Death is not the End' and such like. You know the type, spreading religious goodwill and that sorta thing. Members of a Christian organization, they were, and I admire their bravery...

Especially when nowadays they might get shot up for something like that...

Which makes me wonder how much attention God is really paying to us. And why doesn't He step in when people use Him as an excuse to go out and kill people...

Religion has ended up doing as much harm, as good...

Feedback

People never really need that much of a reason to get together. They may be attracted to each other and have no idea why, they just feel that way.

Makes sense that break ups occur in much the same way, when people stop, for whatever reason, feeling whatever they used to.

But since we never question good thing when they come our way, and whine about the crap when it hits us in the face, I think it's quite a pain to be given a vague reason like 'I just don't feel that way anymore'.

Say whatever you want to, 'Your taste in clothes suck',

'Your deo does nothing for you',

'You look about as attractive as a pair of mud wrestling hippos'...

whatever...you're breaking up, chances are the person's feeling pretty bad anyway. Might as well give em some pointers to improve on.

Which is why I think we ought to make a feedback system for failed relationships...you know, like the ones you got at the end of camps and stuff? Yeah, the ones where everyone wrote 'Twice a day', when you were expected to write your sex...Those form things...

Something like...

'Breaking up after the duration of _____(days/months/years/minutes), It is my last request to you, for old times sake, to pen down the cause of this break up (In not more than 60 words) and answer a few simple questions about our relationship that will help improve the experiences for future partners.

Reason for Break-up_____________________________________________________

Was the 'We can Still be friends' line used?

• Yes

• No

If 'Yes' then was the Offer to downgrade from partner to friend accepted?

• Yes
• No

Did you establish partnerships with Other parties for similar services within the duration of the relationship?

• Yes
• No

If Yes, who is the Punk-ass man-whore in question?-__________________

What would you rate the 'Arrow experience' on a scale of 1 to 10- _____

Would you recommend the 'Arrow Experience' to your friends?

• Yes

If 'Yes' kindly provide the Names and contact numbers of five of your friends. Pics will be appreciated.

_________

_________

_________

Other comments/Suggestions, if any-________________________________________

Thank you for your participation in this survey!'

I dunno about you guys, but this is a system I could get used to...better than hearing 'It's just not working out' or something, anyway.

Our Despo Heroes

I have discussions with my friends sometimes about why the average Indian male is such a freaking horndog.

Which is when I realize, the reason the average Indian man is so perverted...

...Is because the average Indian role model is, too.

Watch the guys staring at the lady's low rider jeans and grinning. Sachin seems to be consciously avoiding looking anywhere in the general direction of the exposed undergarments in question.

But hey, the average homosexual need not assume that cricket is a 'straight pervs only' game...


Because here we see Shreesanth...I suggest you observe closely and notice something

The hand grabbing Shreesanth's privates is not his own, Shreesanth's right hand has the black band on it.

Inference 1- It isn't Sachin, he's usually scratching HIMSELF...

Inference 2- It isn't Dhoni, he's the wicket keeper, and he knows to catch the right balls...also, the gloves make it obvious it isn't him...

Inference 3- It isn't any of the three pervs from the above picture, their hands may be busy with certain other activities...

Inference 4- It's probably a batsman, who doesn't normally have his hands on the ball, and doesn't really know the difference without looking...

Conclusion 1- That's a pretty...intense...way to celebrate...I don' t even want to imagine what goes on in the dressing room...

Conclusion 2- Cricket can be incredibly gay sometimes, thus catering to the depraved masses...No wonder Football isn't popular here...

The End is Near..

As I speak right now, somewhere in Sweden, a bunch of Scientist-types are working on The Large Hadron Collider, the worlds biggest proton accelerator...the worlds biggest anything, for that matter...

Why this is of importance, to all of you people who couldn't care less, is because scientists are attempting to study the formation of the Universe itself, and they are doing this by trying to recreate the Big Bang...

You don't have to be an egghead to figure out that thats the kinda thing that can seriously fuck shit up...The energy of the big bang is of the order of magnitude of 2 raised to a million Joules, which will rip the the crap out of the planet and possibly set up a Universe within a Universe...

But of course there's a very slim chance of that actually happening...

Of course, the formation of Antimatter is a concern, and so is the possible formation of a Black Hole...

Once again, that's not exactly the healthiest thing for a planet, what with being sucked into a sinkhole for matter and energy itself...

This isn't just crap I'm making up, by the way, here's wiki to shed some light on it...

Concerns have been raised about the safety of the LHC on the grounds that high-energy particle collisions performed in the collider might cause disastrous events, including the production of stable micro black holes (mBHs) and strangelets.

Strangelets, by the way refers to the Strange Matter Theory, referred to, here

If the strange matter hypothesis is correct and a strangelet comes in contact with a lump of ordinary matter such as Earth, it could convert the ordinary matter to strange matter. This "ice-nine" disaster scenario is as follows: one strangelet hits a nucleus, catalyzing its immediate conversion to strange matter. This liberates energy, producing a larger, more stable strangelet, which in turn hits another nucleus, catalyzing its conversion to strange matter. In the end, all the nuclei of all the atoms of Earth are converted, and Earth is reduced to a hot, large lump of strange matter.

To put it plainly, we make one particle of strange matter, that sparks a chain reaction that turns all of earth and everything in it into a steaming pile of crap...that turns anything it touches into more crap....

Now, individually, the chances of one of these things happening is pretty low, but club it all together and things get worrysome...

I don't know about you but I'm trying to do as many good deeds as possible beofre the 21st of October...can't be too careful...

100 bullets

100 Bullets is a DC/Vertigo comics crime-drama series, which is slated to continue for (what else) 100 issues...

It exhibits a distinct noir style, in both the story and the language used, which by the way is pretty 'strong'...you have been warned...

I'll let Wiki fill you in on the rest...

100 Bullets is an Eisner and Harvey Award-winning comic book written by Brian Azzarello and illustrated by Eduardo Risso

The initial plot of 100 Bullets hinges on the question of whether people would take the chance to get away with revenge. Occasionally in a given story arc, the mysterious Agent Graves approaches someone who has been the victim of a terrible wrong, and gives them the chance to set things right in the form of a nondescript attaché case containing a handgun, 100 bullets, a photograph of a person, and irrefutable evidence that this person is primarily responsible for their woes. He informs the candidate that the bullets are completely untraceable: any police investigation that uncovers one of them will stop.

Though all of the murders enabled by Agent Graves are presented as justifiable, the candidates are neither rewarded nor punished for taking up the offer, and appear to receive nothing other than closure for their actions. Several people have declined the offer. This is later revealed to be only a minor part of a much wider story.

That's pure noir right there, as in- Crime, Deeply flawed characters, Dark settings, themes like Revenge, Retribution and loads of action...Kinda like a Max Payne paperback...

This is what makes up most of my reading nowadays, and I recommend it to anyone who likes good comics...

The Hitch Hiker's guide to The Galaxy

This book (later adapted to a movie) is summed up in one word...crazy...

Imagine if the author, Douglas Adams, sat down to write it with a long line of tequila shots on one side of his table, a bowl full of assorted hallucinogenic drugs on the other side of the table, and his laptop in the middle- You'd get some idea about how crazy the book is...

Let wiki continue things- do note that the first line on the article is- "all or part of this article may be confusing or unclear', which is just how these books do, y'know?

The book begins when contractors arrive at Earthling Arthur Dent's house in order to demolish it to make way for a bypass. Arthur's friend Ford Prefect arrives as Arthur is attempting to talk the demolition crew into leaving his house standing, and talks Arthur into coming to a local pub with him, at which point Ford explains that he (Ford) is actually from a planet somewhere near Betelgeuse and that they have to get off the planet before it's demolished. An alien race of bureaucrats called Vogons intend to destroy Earth to make way for a "hyperspace bypass".

After which, they hitch-hike across the galaxy, being tortured by bad poetry, dealing with manic depressive robots and elevators that can look into the future, journeying, meeting the president of the Galaxy, quite literally to the end of the universe and back again, being blown back in time, forward in time, or just blown up, quite often...

After which they finally find the Answer to Life, The Universe and everything in it...

Makes for some incredible reading, but it's comedy of a slightly nerdy kind...if you haven't done any science in your short life, you may not get some of the more subtle jokes...

Kick-Ass!

Kick Ass is a brand spankin' new series, written by Mark Millar, started off in April 2008...here's a short summary...

Dave Lizewski is an unnoticed high school student and comic book fan with a few friends and who lives alone with his father. His life is not very difficult and his personal trials not that overwhelming. However, one day he makes the simple decision to become a super-hero even though he has no powers or training

As you can probably see, just looking through that summary, and the attached picture, that this one is pretty darn unconventional. It's pretty darn violent, too, and quite profane...but then again, you're not going to be saying things like 'Blistering Buttercups!' when you're being tortured with a Car Battery wired to your nuts, now, are you?

It completely defies all precedents by showing what REALLY might happen if someone straps on a spandex suit and goes looking for trouble in a rough neighbourhood...not fame and glory, but scars, bruises, life threatening injuries and maybe even the aforementioned car battery burns on your privates...

Look around on the intarwebs and you'll find this comic in a cbr format for easy reading...I've got chapter one and three, and if anyone gets their hands or mouse on chapter 2, be sure to tell me...

What I've been upto...

...Thats worth mentioning, anyway...

This means I'm not mentioning anything to do with studies, I talk about that enough...but don't let that give you the impression that I'm spending my life pissing away my time reading books and watching movies...

The next series of posts are going to be about the movies, comics, manga and books that I've been reading in the last six months...they tend to be things that are relatively unknown, so anyone who has interest in the aforementioned topics should probably stick around...

Comfort Food, Comfort Book...

Who Watches The Watchmen

I've just finished reading the Graphic Novel Masterpiece, The Watchmen...now I'm completely excited about the movie coming out right after my CET exams next year...

Aside from which, I'm also excited about the Max Payne movie, coming out in November...

And 'Wanted' which is releasing here next week...

And Metallica's new album in years, Death Magnetic...

And The new album from The Rasmus...

And The LAmB Anime releasing in October-November....

And Gotham Knight, the prequel to 'The Dark Knight'...

And X-men:Origins-Wolverine...

And Lots of other things to look forward to...if it wasn't for all those darn studies...

Survival Facts for you n00bs!

Just in case you FYJC students googled the name of your college, on a whim, and ended up on this site, here's some vital information to help you through your 2 year ordeal to come...

In other words, Suffer well, you S.O.B...

Facts about Somaiya

1)Being seen Wearing an SK ID card is about the most embarrassing thing that can happen to a person

2)It takes longer to get a new I.D. card than to complete a two year Junior college course

3)All requests have to be sent in writing to the office so that they can be filed, then misplaced, then forgotten, then sold off, then remembered, then recovered and finally buried underground behind the library for six years before any action is taken.

4)Painting is undertaken (without any exaggeration) once every twenty-Five years

5)The colour of the outside building was a dark red colour once upon a time...you would never have guessed that with all the bleaching and the chuna that they apply, would you?

6)There are people in commerce and arts who don't even know what their college looks like.

7)Male Students wearing three-fourth pants are taken to task for 'Gross Indecency'

8)You can find half the answers of your exams written on the walls near you.

9)If you are caught by the principal without wearing an I.D you may be asked 'If you are the poor'

10)The most deadly variety of student here are the Vinay Mandir students-They move in groups and attack in packs, so stay clear and avoid eye contact...

Updata

I'm living alone for this week, and I've taken control of my dad's laptop for the time being.

Somaiya has improved, greatly so, with the inclusion of a new place for students to while away their lectures, a basketball court!

Also, We have cut offs for a shitty college like mine going up to 95% on the first list. For perspective, I'd like you to note that last years 1st list was 85%. If this isn't an Indicator that the 'Normalisation' of marks is a crappy idea, I dunno what is...

LOTS of new movies out, and several hotly anticipated.

Hancock, Jaane Tu, The Incredible Hulk, and coming soon, The Dark Knight...

Can't wait...

'KNVB'

The rains have started, and so has college...a more perfect time for football has yet to be envisioned.

This is largely due to the fact that days on which I go to college are comparitively less hectic than my days off, owing to the fact that my classes tend to ease up on the homework.

The title of this post is the name of a football team that my college mates have knocked together, on a whim, quite spontaneously, on a spur-of-the moment decision about how to spend our free lectures more constructively. This sudden flight of fancy has ended up being taken quite seriously, and I've found myself ending up as part of it, and enjoying it too, even though I don't play that much, or that well, for that matter...

Those of you that follow footy might recognize KNVB as some mildly famous club from the Netherlands. The reason for adopting this name is partly due to the fact that we aim to piggy-back off the real teams success, and also partly because the jerseys came at a bargain price, and we don't have the cash, or the inclination, to print out personalized ones...

So all we needed, was a creative spin on the Acronym, to provide a snappy answer to all those people who asked us what it stands for...

And so the team was gloriously christened- 'The Knight Naughty Virgin Bastards'

A little on the profane side, maybe, and grammatically incorrect, to boot, but with an alternative spelling of Knights & Naughty Virgin Bastards, it might just pass muster. Grammatical accuracy never figures in the grand scheme of things anyway, and you must admit, it sounds less corny (not to mention, less Gay) when compared to 'Kingly Nasty Victory Boys', which was the first suggested idea, which was quickly shot down.

EDIT: Oh wait, it's actually called (much to my annoyance) The KNine VagaBonds, which kinda sounds to me like a stray dogs association...oh well, what the hell...I'm still calling it the 'Virgin Bastards'...

Messages from the Afterlife

Feels like I'm watching my own corpse float downstream on the Ganga...

Which, under normal circumstances is highly unlikely, given that I'm not a religious man, and the corpse eating, flesh ripping carnivorous crabs, that do such a good job of clearing the river of the dead, would probably throw up and reject my impure sinner-body after a few bites of their first course...

But the person currently doing the dance of death? Nope, that there is a pure-hearted, clean minded, hardworking ol' thing who was closer to me than several of my family members, and taught me more than all my college professors combined into one giant 'super professor'...
(I have GOT to quit watching that Gundam thing...)

I am referring, of course, to my ADSL Modem, whose parents at MTNL chose not to name. This was of course, rectified when I saw it work, and my first reaction at surfing the net at 200kbps (compared to a shitty 64), was to christen that piece of pristine white plastic- 'Speedy'...

In all fairness. there were faster modems out there, also bigger, better, whiter, noisier!...but I didn't care. Maintaining a steady packet flow, be it noon or night, together we surfed the internet like Goerge Freeth on 30ft- Hawaiian waves.

Good Times...Goooood times...

But alas, with high speeds come high bills, and it was soon high time that I started studying...seriously...

and so, Speedy is to pass on, to the great big server in the sky, a resting place until he gets his next life, who knows where...

It's hard, I tell you...it's pretty fucking hard to let go of something that has done so much, and asked for so little in return...(except for maybe, an occasional dusting, which is something I've always denied it...)

So Its hard not to take it badly when MTNL asks me to turn in ol' Speedy, personally, at their office, before my internet connection is officially...well..disconnected.

It feels like I just pulled the plug on my Twin Brother's Life Support system, after which the Coroner hands me a goddamn SHOVEL and asks me to bury him myself...

And so, a part of me dies, cannibalized by the part of me that studies and gets yelled at my authority figures...(Sheesh, talk about internal struggles..)

It seems that the (hopefully) somewhat distinguished life of the Unwilling Somaiyaite comes to a pretty untimely end...But fret not (though I don't think any fretting is in progress...) if situations and occasions turn particularly exceptional, I may blog about something that affects me profoundly and makes me wanna yak about it to no one in particular...and send you messages from my permanent adress at the corner of Internet hell...

Which happens like, once every few weeks...

SRK should be available in Liquid form...

...So that every man, woman and child can take an SRK injection. That way, he won't feel the need to plague our senses by parading on every channel on TV, and we might just end up watching something that doesn't contain him.


Sports Channels?- Ever since he bought himself an IPL team
Music Channels- He's come out with Cassettes and CD's of his IPL team's Theme song.
News Channels- When nothing even vaguely or remotely interesting has happened in the film industry. (i.e.- Every Other Day)
Entertainment channel- With his shameless rip off of the '5th Grader' game show genre.
Movie Channels- Do I even need to elaborate?

Of course, This does not include the several thousand times he appears on TV for Advertising and Endorsements.

It seems obvious that SRK has gained/invented/discovered the power of Omnipresence, much to the dismay of the entertainment starved populace.

Dear Mr. Khan....I just want to say, there are some things that Humans just weren't meant to have. And this is one thing YOU just aren't supposed to have. It's morally wrong, and as you know, it's illegal, what with the Laws of Physics and all.

Give it up, dude. Give it up.

Where Movie Merchandising goes horribly wrong...

Thats when you find-

Pirates Of The Caribbean-Jack Sparrow Deodarant spray.-

I shit you not, this is something I saw at my neighborhood supermarket and laughed my head off at, Much to the surprise and shock of innocent bystanders, who were further puzzled when I tried to take a picture of it on my camera phone (Which came out blurred...darn, you'll have to make do by looking for it on google.). They probably thought I was a professional shoplifter adding things to my 'hit-list' or something.

But back to the point, this is an example of A Movie Tie-Up that makes no sense. Because Pirates were the kind of people who bathed rarely, and by rarely, I mean once every few years. Their aroma is the kind expected of the average Scurvy Cur who hasn't changed his underwear since he was five, and who's been stewing in salt water and sweat in the same set of clothes for over three years. 'Pungent' would be an Understatement. 'Putrid' Would be more accurate.
'Fucking crazy' would be a person who would actually want to smell like that.

Oh, and the real kicker is the fine print at the bottom of the can which says '100% Alcohol free'.
Would Jack Sparrow, a character who's most fondly remembered line is, 'But Why is the Rum Gone?', approve?
Quite clearly, Hell No.

Worth a laugh, though.

Out Of The Blue- Fashionable Ignorance

I have deviated from writing about Somaiya and it's Slip Ups on several past occasions. And I Intend to do so a lot more. Just for the hell of it, and don't give me that crap about false advertising unless you want some about freedom of speech. I will however, alert you by adding the phrase 'Out Of The Blue' in the title, to specify that it is a semi-meaningless post filled with crap collected from the seventh ring of Hell. Don't say I didn't warn you

I hate ass baring low rider jeans. With a vengeance.

I hate T shirts with moronic messages like 'Pull me out from the inside' or 'Free Hand lotion, pull below'.

I hate wannabes who take the time to adjust their (much hated) Low rider pants to let the fake brand name 'Jaakey' peek out.

It's about as smart as a Flashlight Shotgun And it makes me happy as a lark to be blissfully unaware about fashionable crap.

But, as a fashionably ignorant nerd, (and proud of it) there are a few things I wish were in fashion.

For instance, T shirts like the ones worn by this lady here.
(Watching 'A Good year' is very bearable when you have bits like this to encourage you)

Now, am I the only person who thinks that kicks ass? Low rider pants? Naah, do one step further and get Low rider, Off-shoulder T-shirts....I think Gucci actually makes em too!

E.V.S. Randomness

Scene: Exam Hall 10 minutes before the E.V.S. exam.

Me: So...What's the portion?

G. : Ahh...You know...Pollution, Major Environmental Issues, Disasters...that kinda thing...

Me: Oh...so...didja study for it?

*Awkward pause, Followed by the laughter of everyone, including me...*

Yeah, Right, like thats gonna happen...

I support the move Of the Maharashtra Board Of Education, to make E.V.S. Compulsory...
After the absorption of large amounts of perfectly irrelevant trivia under the guise of Secondary Education in the 10th std. board exam, I believe that The inclusion of E.V.S. is a great way to develop a skill that comes in handy in everyday Life- The Art Of Bullshit

The best way to make people believe that you are smarter than you actually are...

Looking at the average E.V.S answer sheet, you can see that even if the student might know only one point out of the required four, by twisting and turning the words of the limited information he has, he can make it into as many points as he feels like...

Thus, very few people look through the textbook...and end up having Random conversations about the portion...

Eg:

What to do In case Of a Natural Disaster?

• Move away from the centre of the Disaster, as quickly as possible, to minimize risk to life and limb.
• Run away
• Travel far away from the area of major impact
• Haul your ass the hell outta there...
• In case of Flood, swim Away
• In case of Fire, move quickly towards flood prone area.
• In case Of Fire On The Mountain, run, Run, RUN!
• In case of Toxic Fume Poisoning, do not breathe in.
  
• Curl up in a fetal position and wait for your inevitable destruction, while hoping and praying that it will be swift and painless...though it probably won't be...
• etc, etc...

And some people have strange answers to straightforward questions-

State True Or False

...2)The INSTRUMENT used in measuring Earthquake intensity is the Richter Scale...

A Large number of people said 'True', and argued vehemently about it's being correct...

(The simple explanation is that saying this is 'True' is like saying you measure speed with a 'meteres per second'...)

And the others had to make them see the light of reason by explaining that The Richter scale s NOT some sort of foot-ruler that you stick into earthquake prone area to get a reading...

But the one which takes the cake is the opening line to an answer given by a Commerce student sitting next to me-

Q5
iii) Explain Water Pollution.

Ans. Water pollution is made in water...

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I'll be as free as a bird in a cage with clipped wings as soon as the exams are over. I solemnly swear to update on a regular basis from then.

Chemistry Practicals using Acidic Bases...

'Right, so when you put acid in with base, you get salt and water, and because of the indicator, it changes colour to pink, and thats a sign to stop adding base and measure the liquid levels...'

Titration/Volumetric Analysis, call it what you want, it's easy money...

Except if your Lab Assistant is a complete and utter Screw-up...

I had my practical exams on Friday, Chemistry is just plain simple, because board rules allow the use of the manual during the exam...sort of an Open-book test...

So I got a Titration experiment, find the normality, HCl, NaOH, Yada-Yada-Yada...The usual...

But what was just friggin unusual was when I emptied a burette-full of base into the acid and still couldn't see a color change...
I checked it, double checked it, then decided that it must be a problem with the indicator...I look at my Phenolptalein bottle, and see a piece of chalk floating around...

So I nicked myself another bottle, only to have the same result...

Then I realize that the dude had given me Acid in both beakers, some idiot had filled it into a beaker marked 'base' and then handed it to me, both are colourless, low concentration solutions, and look exactly the same...I go up to the teacher with this, and he doesn't believe me...

His test to see if I'm right? He puts it on his hand...

Yeah...no joke...apparently acid burns differently than base...I can't tell, myself, seeing that I never tried it...He seemingly has a lotta experience with such retarded behaviour...

Blog damn it!

Unfortunately, certain people around me now know that I maintain a blog...

And now, not one single, mundane, boring-ass, everyday event can occur without some smart ass Spaz saying 'Aw, dude, you gotta put this on your blog!'

I mean-

*In College*

Spaz: Hey, that chick is always hanging out with guys! Dude, you should write about it on your blog!

Me: -_- ...No

*In an Electronics Lecture*

Spaz: Oh man, is Sir pulling his cell phone out from under his shirt?

Me: Yes, just like he did yesterday...

Spaz:Hey, write about it in your blog!

Me: Ah?um...no, it was funny the last time, but now it's just disgusting...

Spaz: Ah? ya na, thats why it's funny na! hey put it, ok, put it when you reach home today...

Me: No...

*In the Chemistry Lab*

Spaz: Hey look at that! Her hair's on fire! just like last week!Woo Hoo! look at her run!

Me: I am NOT writing about...

Spaz: Why don'tcha write about THAT on your blog!

Me: AARGH!!!!! -_-***

It Went Ahead and made my day...

I was watching an Extreme Sports parody show on AXN when the commentator plays a video of guys experimenting with Mentos and Diet Coke, shooting it into 10 metre high fountains...

This is what he had to say

'Well, if there are any parents watching this, we know whats on your mind, and we agree, this is totally irresponsible, dangerous behaviour...Of course, we also know there are NO parents watching this, Therefore, let's try this with 5 litre bottles instead of 3 litre bottles!

Oh wait, even better, let's try it with 3 boxes of Tic Tac, and Mountain Dew!

Ohhh, no...Wait...Hold it, I got the best one...

Eat 5 kilos of mentos, wait 4 hours for it to digest, and then have a Diet coke Enema!!!!
I Believe I Can Fly!!!!!

Funniest Comment on Soda-Shooting...Ever...

Engrish!

So, with the Beijing Olympics coming soon, reports are coming in from newspapers talking about how China is rushing to improve it's English skills, in an attempt to attract more spectators and fans, and to make their stay in china more convenient...

I didn't realize it was this bad...they have their hands full taking care of this issue...take a look...



They mean 'no Soccer...'

Observations...

Have you ever noticed?...

1) If you use In-Ear headphones, and walk down the street, you can't hear anything around you, and after a while, you feel like your life has Background Music...

2)If you live in the suburbs of Mumbai, and you see a person wearing a T-shirt with a Nirvana/Led Zeppelin/Metallica/Iron Maiden emblem emblazoned across it, chances are he/she won't be able to name a single song from that artist

3)The bills stuck on Walls/Electricity units, etc, which say 'stick no bills' must be the single most ironic thing that we see on a day to day basis...

4)That Buddhists...who are the most ardent followers of Non-Violence...were rioting, burning and destroying property in the city recently?

5)That society frowns upon homosexuals, as well as Couples in general...so what do they want people to be anyway?

6)That if you pronounce the word 'Somaiya' with less of a Gujarati twang and more of a French accent (So-MA-Yuh), 50% of people from 'town' will raise their eyebrows with a visibly impressed expression on their faces...

7)That I got you with the old 'You-Are-So-Blind-You-Didn't-see-that-there-is-no-number 3-on this list' joke...

8)That there actually WAS a number 3 on this list...Ha Ha, made you look!

9) That it's 'against our Indian traditions' to walk around holding hands with a girl, but hordes of guys walk around hand-in-hand, arm-linked-in-arm, being downright campy, and nobody says a thing...Does that means that Indians were traditionally gay?Whoa...

10)That ignorant morons who read the above will either conclude that I'm gay, or a homophobe...neither, suckers, it's just an observation!

Oscars!

Yeah, It'll be coming on T.V. at 6:30 am tomorrow morning...which Is when I'll be in an auto on my way to Electronics Practicals...

It's just no fun watching the Encore presentation, because my sister is going to watch it from start to finish, and destroy whatever suspense I may have wanted to preserve, the moment I get back home...

Anyway, I'm rooting for Ellen Page for best actress...it's time to give young blood a chance!

This post will be updated after I watch the Oscars...keep an eye on this space!

If your'e Emo and you know it...rant like crazy...

A Disheartening Fact-
When you don't have college for a while, you end up having LESS free Time
than you would have had if you HAD college...this is because of the loss of 'tired' time, where if you look tired when you come home from college, you are 'leniently' given some time on the P.C....

A Depressing Fact-
When You don't have college , AND you are not allowed recreational diversions like Computer Games and quality T.V., You have more time to sit and meditate about how much the world, and people in general, Suck...

A Downright Emo Fact-
I now know how PV_Mills Feels...

That should give you an idea of how bad a week I've been having...

Dance Teacher Dictatorship

I step out of my room for 2 minutes yesterday, and my mom was watching some crap channel with Saroj Khan teaching people how to dance. One step, two step blah blah blah blablah..

It kinda hit me how silly the whole thing was...I mean, dance was invented as a physical form of showing happiness, kinda like jumping for joy..as part of celebration...you know, back in the old days, the Stone Age, when you didn't get food for a party, you threw a party if you got food!

Saroj Khan's Authoritative commands to the meek and unquestioningly co-operative contestants reminded me strongly of De Fuerher standing before his ranks of stormtroopers watching them march with unfailing rhythm...well, it better have been unfailing, if they didn't want Herr Hitlers foot up their backsides...

Gosh, we live in a Democratic country, and yet we say nothing against the legions of dance teachers and choreographers who try to teach you how to dance, basically telling you how to move, what to do, what not to do, how to look, etc...when in reality it is a form of art, which stems from a persons own creativity...

Sounds like Fascism to me...And as A free citizen of a Democratic nation, I do not take kindly to people abusing their authority and forcing others to do as they say. This is INDIA! here we BRIBE people to do as we say!!

And now, commercialized and perverted beyond recognition, almost tailor-made to make non-dancers feel like dorks...In a moment of pure spite I snatched up the remote and put it on mute...and all of a sudden the show seemed a lot better...it seemed like a robot impersonators convention, which was, quite frankly, hilarious...

Mom wasn't happy though, and my break ended up ending prematurely...

College again...

Monday...Bloody Monday...
I wonder if people have done a study on Monday Morning Suicide rates...it's the time of the week when most people feel the most messed up...

Aren't Electronics practicals at 7 in the morning a GREAT incentive for me to wake up early and freeze my 'nads off on my way to college...?

No

Crummy teacher walks in late and then yells at the people who came in after 7, but still earlier than her...then she whines about the people who are absent...Then she whines about the 12th standard students and how pathetic they are...then she whines about how they whine about how she teaches like a retard. And then this makes me whine to you about her whining about the students' whining about her teaching...

It's a vicious system to be caught in, I assure you...

More to come!...
like...
Eventually...

Something entirely wierd and Random

Err...I've been expecting that this moment might come sometime...but I didn't expect that I would be the person to trigger this strange occurrence...

Happy Birthday to me...Happy Birthday to MEEE!!!!

Happy birthday to Moi! I'm now seventeen! My folks have gone to Pune, and I've ended up all alone at home all day today...Because I had classes in the morning...seems like a pretty Lonely birthday...

*phone rings*
Hey Ace! Thanks, oh wait a sec, I got another call
*click*
Dodo! nice to hear from ya, Thanks man, no I don't have any plans, I'm stuck at ...oh hold on, another call...
*click*
Oh, Hi Kushal...
*click*
Oh Hey Akshay...
*click*
Sid...
*click*
A.B...Along with a whole buncha people from school..
*click*
Darshan...
*click*

Whoa...All of a sudden...I feel a lot less lonely...
Happy Republic Day to all o y'all! And thanks for exceeding my expectations with the pretty huge number of hits so far!

Those Three letters...

Read this Dilbert strip on HT last week...


Kinda reminds me of a Professor of mine...from my classes...

I'm sure you've noticed, most successful people are annoying as hell...
And this professor is no exception...He got some high rank in the IIT-JEE and got into the Mumbai IIT, after which he started teaching, ONE YEAR after he finished his own exam...he started his own damn coaching classes, and now works as a professor part time...

He tried to 'encourage' us to work harder by talking about the perks of being an IITian...his speech was something like this


Sir:-Ahem...now...anyone here on Orkut, facebook, Hikut, Chirkut, Friendster, or BigAdda?

Class:- *uneasy silence*

Sir:- I'd advise you to stop doing such timepass right now...look...let me tell you...I have all the compilations Of Calvin and Hobbes, Peanuts, Garfield, Pearls Before Swine, Doonesbury,Asterix and Tintin...


Me:- *thinking*Okay...assuming that's true, since the cost of one C&H book is 700 bucks, and the number of em will be around 10, he just put down 7 grand on ONE SEVENTH of his Comic Book collection...approximately...


Prof:- *Continues* I also have a PS2, a PS3 and an Xbox 360...several suppliers and developers have approached me to be part of their beta testing teams, when I was living in the UK, and on more than a few occasions. And so I've been given a copy of a game sometimes several weeks beforehand...I'm currently playing Gears Of War, Burnout Paradise and Assassin's Creed...

I've watched Alvin and the Chipmunks thrice, and Taare Zameen Par 5 times already, twice before it actually released, and all this is because of those three letters that are part of my Resume...'I I T'...

If I wasn't an IITian, I'd probably be working for an IITian who'd call me up at 11pm to say 'Hey dude, could you do this work too?'

So thats why you have to work hard for the next two years...

He was trying to encourage us...all he did was piss us the hell off...that old fart gets to play Assassin's friggin Creed while we slog our rears off...!

More funny Dilbert Strips now...these are on Asok the IITian...

Online Personality Splitter...

I was talking to a friend of mine the other day, and she told me that she had just read my blog, and said something pretty interesting...

Her exact words were, 'Why don't you act the way you do on your blog, all the time...?'

Which brings up a lot of things...
The stuff I put up here is my own opinion. but it normally stays like a little voice in my head, making observations about crap around me...Now that I blog, the only thing that's changed is that I give vent to all that, online...

Normally stuff like that stays in a persons mind, only coming out during conversations with like minded persons...known as 'Bitching sessions', in colloquial terms...

But the Internet has changed all that...now people whine about their jobs, their friends, their boss, their college life...blah...

Why do I bring this up? I was informed about an NDTV special feature on Indian bloggers, and whether Blogging in general is good or bad...I cannot understand where the dispute stems from...

Some say it's bad because it consists of inane, banal 'Water cooler conversations' which people write...

I say, if it's inane and banal, that just means it's better than your average K-serial, which nobody seems to have a problem with...

Some say it's bad because people write (quote) 'Titillating accounts of their romantic escapades' (unquote)

I say, the only people who visit such places are those who haven't realized the disgusting vastness of internet porn, where your every sick fantasy can be fulfilled...from children to senior citizens...eew...

But people barely ever whine about that, Ignoring the fact that there are about 5 porn sites for every 'Titillating' blog in existence...

Some say that people who write about their lives and the people around them end up damaging other people's reputations...(I take some deep offense at this line considering that this is MY category..)

Ahem?? If bloggers, who write for a very limited audience end up 'Tarnishing images and messing with reputations' then what about gossip columnists in national daily newspapers who make every unverified rumor into Page 3 propaganda? What about the Bombay Times and crap magazines like 'Stardust' and 'Glamor ' which are rags so deeply steeped in nonsense that the fact that they have a million strong subscriber base is justification enough even for the existence of blogs like these...

Point is, that this citizen journalism thing stems from the Internet as a catalyst itself...there's something about Web 2.0 that makes you want to give your opinion about things and listen to opinions too...
And the reason is Anonymity!!!
You don't know who the person yelling at *Fill in the blank with a thing you hate* is, and nobody knows you either!

Imagine for example, if the director of Area 51 cracked under the pressure of keeping top secret stuff so top secret, and finally acknowledges the existence of Aliens...nobody can hold that against him, because no-one knows it's him in the first place...

You can give your opinion without fear! Free speech is finally discovered! and so if something happens, be prepared to get an opinion about it...lots and lots of opinions from people who you've never met but who probably make more sense than the people you have met...that's why Anonymity shouldn't be considered a screen to hide behind, it's a weapon, which kinda splits your personality and brings out that dark, angry side of you and your opinions...
Where nobody can hurt you for saying the truth!

If this scares you, realize that a dark side is part of everybody, and that all the internet has done is given people to vent their feelings...The guy whose blog you're reading could be just about anybody...
And maybe the guy you see walking by is the guy who criticizes George Bush online every night,

And maybe a soldier in Afghanistan is writing poetry, between his patrol shifts, about the futility of War...

And maybe the Guy you see in college, looking like any average joe, with messy hair and thick glasses is just another nerdy student trying to get his 105...
Or he could just be me...

Tired...

Last few days have been hectic...
The things I've said and the things I've heard,
I'd describe it all along the lines of...


Wake up!
Get ready, your exam starts any minute now!
Run,Run,Run!
Revise Revise Revise!!

Get to College!
Revise Revise Revise Some more!
Whaddya mean Alkynes is part of the Chemistry portion!??
The Chem exam is in another 3.5 minutes!
What's the point of even studying now??
Let's just count down the minutes...
2.5...
1.5...
0.5...
Oh Hell, what's that German guy's rule again?
Satzyeff?
Markownikoff??
It's got a lotta 'f's in it, thats all I remember...
Oh crap, there goes the bell,
Best Of luck!

*one hour later*
Awesome paper!!
You didn't think so?
No, I didn't get that one...
Not so awesome anymore...still pretty good...
Don't tell me, I don't wanna hear more of your answers...
We still have Math to study for!! D'oh!!

Whats the whole Permutation-Combination Shindig again?

And then get back home...
How was the Paper?
Good? not Great? you always say Good and then it goes Ok...and what about math?
Math was Ok? that means it went bad!...
Arrgh! -_-*

Don't you have class tonight?
D'oh!
Do a crapload of homework!
Get to class early to finish up!
Prof. ends up 15 minutes late...
So class ends half an hour late...
go Home
Eat, Sleep
Lather, Rinse, repeat...

Feel tired at a whole new level...not the 'I gotta sit down and catch my breath' kinda tired...more like the ;Oh crap, I'm standing and sleeping and there's drool collecting in my mouth and nothing collecting in my brain and it feels like my mind is a racecar doing 90 mph with it's tyres removed or like I'm powered by a half dead Triple-A pencil battery that's three years past it's expiry date...

And you people whine about no updates...
gits...-_-

What is a Somaiyaite?

I Found this draft post today. I'd written it out six months ago. At The time, it felt unnecessarily vitriolic, and I shelved it. Coming across it again today, I conclude that getting vitriol out of my system is the whole point of this blog, and so I'm going to post it.

What is a Somaiyaite?

Simple question? in one sense, maybe...a person who goes to Somaiya College is a Somaiyaite...

But when you put it into context...you must say it's quite inaccurate...I probably paint quite a dismal picture of my ex college and the people in it...there ARE good people there as well, no matter how hard it is to find them and no matter how few of them there may be...

But what a Somaiyaite really is, is a general term, a Metaphor, for 'Unthinking Conformer to Society'
...People who follow the crowd like their life depends on it, who stare at Logic full in the face and choose to ignore it completely...who think 'current affairs' begins and ends with some shitty actress's shitty life, and are scandalized at the slightest hint that others don't give a fuck because other people have lives of their own...

People who think only what others tell them to, resulting in shallow crap like-'Chicks dig the cell phones!', 'Wear them low rise jeans, everyone wants to see your ass-crack', 'Paint your Car Lemon Green, and slap some senseless decals on them'.

So you don't have to be from Somaiya to be a Somaiyaite. Most of us probably know a few who fit this description. I just know that It's been months since I've left the place, but I will always be an Unwilling Somaiyaite.

And Thats why I'm yet to change my Blog Title. Cause when I think about it, it still holds true.

New Years Eve Throwdown, New Years Day Letdown

Just so I can get it out of the way,
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

I'm sure most of you went partying...and if you are in a situation that is anything like mine...you probably didn't enjoy it much...

But the right to Par-Tay is one that not everyone is treated to...I for one had to fight for it, along with the people in my (stupid, stupid) class...

Because last week they handed in a schedule that said 'Thermodynamics lecture from 6:00 to 10:00 on 31st December...'

And we said 'WTF???"

And they said something about 'Attending class and sacrificing will prove your 'solidarity' and whatnot'

And we said 'Screw you, we don't need to...'
Or words to that effect...

Eventually , we Threw down...they Threw Down...and we finally got them to 'Maybe Reconsider' their decision...


And they gave us a new schedule the next day, which said that we don't have class on New Years Eve...

But we have a goddamn PCM Combined TEST on New Years Day...
( Assholes )

And in the End, I, like many others, ended up thinking about going out with friends, only to have the decision vetoed by my folks and my ass carted off to A party that I didn't like, surrounded by people I didn't know, Listening to music that I didn't like (It was from the wrong decade...no, wait...the wrong century...), Wearing formal crap that I hate to wear and look like a clown in, and Eating the kick-ass food because I didn't have much else to do...

Nice Party...=_=...NOT...

2008 started out pretty crappy for me...but things can only get better, right?...(well they'd better get better...)
More to come...sooner or later

P.S.-No resolutions, no changes, I'm still the same and so is my blog...the new year didn't really change me that much, but it sure changed your blog, Dylan!